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04:48 p.m. - 03-26-2001 Hey NowDiaryland let me back in, yey!! Rock on world, I've returned! Well, I've learned many things today. I've learned that things aren't always what they seem. I've also learned that seeing is believing. Wow, that's almost an oximoron, huh? Well, all I know is that I do like my job, but at times I don't "love" it. Why? I like it because I'm interacting w/ kids on a daily basis. I like most of my students. I really like some of them. I totally LOVE (non-sexually) a small amount of them. But I truck on...doing the daily tasks. There are days I wonder how in the HELL I got the job. Why? Well, because things happen ONLY to me. For instance, I am the ONLY one who sees a student who is on suspension walking around the school. I am the ONLY one who certain (3) students misbehave for. Therefore, I'm told, I am too intense and thereby probably incite that behavior. What do I think about it? Screw you. I'm me, get over it. Me? What is that? I am an outspoken (at times), intense, likable, sometimes funny, very protective of my students person. I will either bless you or summond you to solitary confinement. I will back you up or totally crucify you. How come I'm so diverse? I've learned, once they know what you're about, they try to control you. I never write the same style test twice. I never walk the same way to class more than twice. I am unpredictable and that keeps things interesting. Some days I might decide to do things a whole lot differently than I normally might. Just for effect. Why effect? Because I have to keep them on their toes. Do they hate me? Some of them do, I'm sure. Do they like me? Yeah, a bunch of them do. My room is always filled before school w/ girls who come to hang out. They love me, I am their Queen. Speaking of.....my line for outofline students: "I am Goddess of this Island" Take note of that one, it's good. Also, if they didn't like me, they wouldn't IM or PM me constantly when I'm online. AND...they wouldn't dedicate portions of their info screens (IM) to me if they didn't like me a lil. Am I bragging? Damn tootin I am. I finally am making progress. And all in my first year. Yey me! Well, I'm off to participate in a school function-thing. Have a good nite.
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